After Guido describes Deirdre's hideous face to his wife, she commits suicide. The police try to pin a murder rap on Guido.; Bert becomes a movie star.; Maurice and Constable Bob observe Indian manhood initiation rituals.; An inmate at an asylum mistakes a window washer for a man threatening to jump.; A man has a car alarm installed, but his car is broken into anyway and his neighbors cause major damage trying to shut off the alarm.; Politenessman shows a Senator the proper way to display gift checks.; Zeb tries to be polite at his favorite restaurant, even though the food makes him sick.; Aunt Mary shows pictures from her brother's photo album.; Bill's talking penis comes up with a series of one-liners.; Lessons in how a waitress can ignore customers.