Mr. Weatherbee despairs at either Archie or Reggie being elected student body president. As principal he must remain neutral, but finally concludes that scatterbrained Archie would be marginally better than conniving Reggie. With the election a tie, both boys clamor for Betty's vote, she having been out sick. Despite her resentment of how Archie has favored Veronica, Betty concludes that Reggie would be a bad choice. Mr. Weatherbee privately congratulates her, and advises Reggie to run for vice-president -- second best to Archie is better than nothing.; A blow to the head in gym class gives Little Archie the ability to see the future, but he is traumatized by a dream about an unidentified girl wearing a red dress and being badly hurt by a car. The next day he spots Veronica walking into town wearing red, and snatches her out of the street just in time. He's only stunned, but the blow removes his clairvoyance.; Jughead tries working in the school kitchen for career day, but finds annoying frustration. Instead of that, he shadows a professional mattress tester.; Archie promises Veronica classy transportation for their date in the evening, then sets out to earn gas money by raking Mr. Weaherbee's leaves. He tries to speed things up with a riding mower that runs out of control, careering down the street with Archie and Weatherbee perched aboard. Veronica assumes that this is the surprise vehicle, and breaks their date.; Archie and Jughead each compile quotes about women for a school assignment. Archie rushes to share his lovely quotes with Veronica, not realizing that he has snatched up Jughead's list of negative quotes. Veronica is furious.; Little Archie wants to take Veronica out, but his dad will ground him if he has a bad report card. He fakes illness to leave before they're handed out, but Reggie "helpfully" offers to personally deliver at Little Archie's home. Both boys are shocked when Mr. Andrews is thrilled at the grades, and even gives him extra money for the date. It turns out that Little Archie's card has been switched with Dilton's.; When the mayor cuts school budgets, Mr. Weatherbee runs to replace him. The students become avid campaign volunteers, though they're troubled that disciplinarian Mr. Howitzer expects to be their new principal. As Weatherbee gains in the polls he cuts a deal with the mayor. Mr. Weatherbee will withdraw if the mayor restores the cuts and even increases the school budget. Everyone is happy but Mr. Howitzer.; Student use of the cafeteria is slumping, so Miss Beazly hires Jughead to promote foreign dishes by wearing national costume. Unfortunately Tyrolean shorts and a Scottish kilt prove that his legs drive girls wild. Woman-hating Jughead draws the line at a Greek soldier's kilt, and the project ends.; Archie is shopping at the electronics store, but Jughead convinces him that everything there will soon be out of date. Archie decides to spend his money on Veronica, as a date with a girl is not at all likely to become obsolete.; Reggie explains that his outstanding school record is in pursuit of his goal to become a game show host, surrounded by beautiful women. He's so convincing that the counselor decides to change careers.; Reggie annoys Archie and Chuck by bragging about what a great football receiver he is, though they have to admit that's he actually is the best. Reggie loses the ball in the sleet-filled final seconds of a tie game. Archie catches it, scores, and becomes a hero.; Mr. Weatherbee keeps suggesting outdated football plays to Coach Kleats, who says he'll eat the football if any of them ever work. When the Coach is injured Weatherbee takes over. The opponents have never faced anything like these plays from 1925, so Riverdale wins. Mr. Weatherbee delivers the game ball to Coach Kleats in the hospital, and he prepares to eat it.; At a story conference with the editor, Archie moans that adventure stories written by Dan Parent leave him exhausted and battered. Gorelick suggests that they substitute one of Parent's slapstick humor scripts. Archie suffers four pages of non-stop pratfalls, then decides that an adventure plot is not so bad after all.; Girls are fawning on Archie because he's to judge a beauty contest. Reggie lends Archie his sports car but removes the frammastas so that the car will break down and Reggie can take his place. Archie arrives just as the contest ends, revealing that he's actually relieved. With one winner selected the other girls are furious. Archie lends Reggie his jalopy for an escape, but promises the girls he won't get far. Archie has removed the frammastas.; It's fad day at school, and Mr. Weatherbee repeatedly hurts his back and exhausts himself trying out the twist, Hula Hoops, phone booth stacking, and more. He's glad the day has ended but the superintendent, who's been watching surreptitiously, insists that they repeat it for TV news the following day. Mr. Weatherbee revives the fad of blowing his stack at Archie, who started the whole thing.; Hoping to sour Veronica on Archie, Reggie splices a tape recording so that Archie appears to be speaking harshly of her. Veronica rushes to Archie and begs his forgiveness for behaving so badly that he would feel that way.; Reggie tries fast-talking a new girl, who demolishes him with martial arts. Her father is director of the new law enforcement program.; Archie is disappointed that the family has to give up dessert so that his father can lose weight. But when Little Archie stops in at the Chock'lit Shop, Mr. Andrews is there enjoying a huge dessert.; Betty and Veronica agree that we should be happy with what we've got, though Veronica points out that that also means we should make sure we get enough.; Archie tells Pop Tate he'll be back for two to go, but never tells him two what.; Archie longs to hear a female voice on the phone. Reggie dials the recording for the time.; Fred is thrilled about how Archie is concerned that he have a hot breakfast, but all Archie does is heat up the milk in the cereal.; Archie and Reggie slang each other with dietary suggestions.; Reggie wants to give June a special treat. Using mirrors, he lets her look at him four times at once.; Archie wants to know if the garage has fast food. The vending machine shoots out food fast enough to knock him down.; The good part of Reggie's dream is that Betty and Veronica were in a race with Archie as the prize. The bad part is that they both refused to run.; Reggie asks to borrow Mr. Lodge's sports car, but not for a date with Veronica -- he wants to take another girl.; Archie is a stage magician cutting a woman in half. Jughead wants him to do the same with food prices.; Mr. Andrews is looking forward to a quiet afternoon, but Little Archie plans to blast the room with a CD from the latest rock band sensation.; Jughead is sleeping over at Little Archie's where Hot Dog howls at midnight for his regular snack. They boys toss spaghetti out the window, covering Mr. Andrews who's chasing the dog away.; Reggie crashes Midge's party, and says he'll leave when he's good and ready. When Moose starts chasing him, he decides he's ready.; Reggie proposes that he and Archie split the nights they can date Veronica each week, but he knows she's already committed on the nights he suggests for Archie.; A mere drop of a new perfume will get any woman her man. Figuring that Jughead is an extra challenge, Ethel buys a gallon.; Reggie laughs at Archie for bringing an apple to the teacher. When he learns that Miss Grundy knows he drew an unflattering picture of her, he brings in a watermelon.; Archie and Veronica are in a play. Jughead uses a toilet plunger to simulate kissing.; As Veronica holds forth at length in the student council meeting, Archie thinks her voice is like music. A bored Reggie says it's the theme from Jaws.; Moose uses a toothbrush on his comb, to keep its teeth clean.; Archie makes call after call trying to locate Veronica, and finally reaches her through the prop phone while she's acting a scene on stage.; Archie wants to collect his thoughts before he leaves. Reggie figures that will take five seconds.; Reggie says Midge should be nice to Moose, since it's Be Kind to Animals Week. Moose clobbers him.; Archie fakes a cold to get out of a test. Mr. Weatherbee says that HE will go home to avoid catching it.; Mr. Weatherbee is angry at employers who fired Moose simply because he couldn't remember their telephone number. But it turns out that the number is 555-5555.; Mr. Weatherbee doesn't believe that Archie got 100% in math.; Jughead manages to injure himself and Reggie repeatedly, while putting up a sign for Accident Prevention Week.; Milo is tired of being teased about his height. When Archie asks what's up, Milo clobbers him.; Archie's not nervous about a visit to the dentist, because he only comes in to read the magazines.; The repairman is an expert at taking the computer apart. The expert at putting it together will come next week.; Moose misinterprets the orders at the Chock'Lit Shoppe.; After a tough exam, Archie asks Brenda for a date. She disdains him in multiple-choice format.; Sharon wants Dilton to kiss her good night, but he's worried a spy satellite might see them.; Reggie yaks about himself so much that Archie asks the garage to fit him with a muffler.; Reggie gets up as a palmist for the charity fair. Archie wants his future read, but Reggie sneers that he doesn't have one.; Archie wonders if he will ever, like Napoleon, have a pastry named for him. Reggie suggests crumb cake.; Archie wants to send Veronica a card for the anniversary of their first date. Reggie suggests a sympathy card.; Archie is leaving town for a conference on improving the environment. Reggie thinks that his absence makes an improvement already.; Veronica wonders why Archie's car has no windshield wipers. Archie points out that there's no windshield.; When Beazley complains that her uniform makes her look 70, Weatherbee replies that it does in fact make her look younger. She clobbers him with a pie.; Jughead empties the punchbowl at Veronica's party in one go.; Jughead takes the legs off Veronica's pinball machine, because he does his best work lying down.; Archie demands more privacy for the students. Mr. Weatherbee sends him to detention.; When Mr. Weatherbee demands Archie's alibi, Archie says he doesn't know what for. Weatherbee thinks that's a lousy alibi.; Reggie has a wrestling hold that's impossible to break. Moose proves him wrong.; Archie wants a $20 loan. Reggie demands security, then laughs uproariously when Archie offers his jalopy.; Betty says that Reggie is self-centered, so he asks Archie's opinion. Archie thinks Reggie is swell -- and so is his head.; Reggie offers to flip the waiter double or nothing for his tip. The waiter wins, so Reggie gives him the dime.; Reggie laughs at Moose for not knowing where the auto muffler goes. Moose shoves it into Reggie's mouth.; Reggie brings Veronica gifts. She accepts the flowers and candy, but rejects his photo.; Moose numbers his boxing gloves, so he can give the old one-two.; Archie thinks that a life sentence is the worst imaginable. Moose thinks a sentence to write for English is worse.