Reggie lent Archie an old alarm for a science experiment, but Archie objects to what Reggie wants in return.; Jughead keeps trying to warn Archie of danger, but he doesn't listen.; Archie dreams he's a caveman, but doesn't understand why the guys with funny shapes (Betty and Veronica) want him to catch them.; Mr. Lodge wants Veronica to learn to play an instrument. Veronica doesn't want to, and the surrounding area is suffering from the titanic battle of wills.; Resenting the teachers' belief that accidents naturally happen when he's around, Archie tries to prove that trouble can happen when he's not around.; Veronica wants Archie to bring some records to her house but insists he doesn't bring Jughead.; To bust up Betty's date with Archie, Veronica handcuffs herself to Archie's wrist. Then she finds out Betty and Archie's "date" was a trip through the local swamp.; In a story mostly told in narrative captions, Archie gets a chance to redeem himself in Mr. Lodge's eyes when he notices a fire in the Lodge mansion.; Arrr! Archie, aka Cap'n Kidd, tries to be the scurviest swine on the high seas with the help of a book that teaches him how to talk pirate. Meanwhile, Betty, the booty, shoots the cap'n in the behind with a pistol.; When Archie breaks a date with Betty again, she snaps and decides to murder him. After Betty makes several attempts on Archie's life, involving falling trees and wagons full of bricks, Jughead suggests that Archie try to pacify her.; Everything Archie does brings a little more hilarity into Mr. Lodge's life.; Betty's pastries are out-selling Veronica's at the Riverdale High charity bazaar. So Archie bribes Jughead to buy one and eat it.; The students protest Mr. Weatherbee's cancellation of the school dance class.; Mr. Lodge demands that Veronica earn the money for her new formal gown.; Archie runs against Reggie for student council president.; Archie is scribbling the initials "AA" and "TW" on anything that doesn't move, so Betty and Veronica are determined to find out just who "TW" is.; Archie breaks a date with Veronica when he has to tidy up the garden. So Veronica goes searching for Reggie. Betty then comes over to help Archie with the garden.; Veronica shows Archie an athletic medal Reggie gave her, just to make Archie jealous. It spurs the teen to enter and nearly kill himself in the next track and field meet.; Mr. Lodge asks Veronica what she sees in Archie and she can't think of anything to say.; Jughead learns to control the weather and uses his newfound power to unleash the elements on Reggie.; In order to tease Archie, Betty and Veronica claim Dilton is a chick-magnet. Through a series of coincidences, Archie comes to believe them.; Archie isn't too worried when Reggie takes Veronica out driving; she appreciates him more after a date with Reggie.; Jughead challenges both Archie and Reggie to beat him at ping-pong on his home table.; To demonstrate to Archie that wealth has its privileges, Veronica has one of her father's assistants perform three out of the ordinary tasks.; As usual, Big Moose takes what people say much too literally!; Li'l Jinx's dad lost his voice and has to write messages.; Jinx dreams of various things she wants to do when she grows up.; Archie thinks he should be colored blue.; Li'l Jinx's dad gets upset when Li'l Jinx interrupts him while reading a book.