Jodie's family is found camping on the Lodge's property and during a scuffle to get them to move out, their van careens down a hill with Jodie inside. But Archie saves the day with a daring jump.; Archie and Jughead help Archie's dad fix the roof.; Valerie goes away to take care of a sick grandmother but the girls don't believe her and blame her leaving on a club owner, so they play poorly on purpose.; Samantha is tired of her dad treating her like a little girl and accidentally scares her dad when he overhears her conversation with Bingo and misinterprets it as a marriage proposal.; The girls get new hairdos but the boys don't notice.; Hilda resorts to witchcraft and even physically throws out a salesman who won't take no for an answer... and Sabrina walks in and buys from him.; Ethel's new parrot, Ralph, flies away each night and one night lays an egg in an abandoned house used by crooks. Ralph makes such a ruckus repeating crime show scenes that the crooks fall into the basement of the house and are trapped.; Archie shines up his old jalopy but it's still just as noisy as ever so Veronica refuses to ride in it. But Betty both sees the beauty and welcomes any excuse to be with Archie.; Veronica accidentally invites both guys on a date, where Reggie shows off so much that she finally sneaks away with just Archie.; Archie fails a test and Miss Grundy recommends he study with Betty and Veronica, who both aced it. But Betty spends the time playing house and Veronica becomes angry, so the only subject he does well in is war.; Sis buys Billy a space helmet for his birthday and uses a fishbowl for a helmet for herself, becoming stuck and unable to enjoy the birthday goodies.; Archie is too frequently careless at home so his father decides that anyone who breaks the dishes next will have to wash all the windows. Of course Archie's father is next to break some dishes.; Sabrina refuses to take up the deviltry of witchcraft as practiced by her family. The Head Witch, Della, attempts to discipline her, but Sabrina is protected by love.; Miss Grundy gets a new job at a private school, but Archie finds a way to show her she won't fit in, before she makes the final decision.; In trying to help Betty and Veronica settle an argument, Archie and Reggie come to blows.; Freddy wants attention, so he grabs things when no one is looking and then claims to "find" them, to accolades from everyone.; Archie and Jughead dress up in some old Scottish costumes, accidentally scare a neighbor, and pay off Herbie with ice cream so he won't tell the police who scared the neighbor.; Pat believes in superstitions such as walking under a ladder being bad luck, but gets the worst end of things trying to avoid them.; Reggie delays Archie from an appointment with Veronica, only to find they were planning his surprise birthday party.; Archie makes a comparison of Mr. Lodge's wealth in a way Jughead can understand.; Jinx is sick so her father walks a neighbor's dog, discovering where Jinx goes when the dog leads him.; Dilton uses Archie's gasoline buying habits as an example when converting metric units.; Sampson tries to show how connected he is with his daughter by dancing, but he dances a waltz to a boogaloo song.; Svenson has let maintenance backlog too long.; Variation on the old "draw a horse and the horse will draw the wagon" gag.; Fred walks into a farm field thinking a sign offers it for sale, only to find it is the farmer's bull that's for sale.; Jinx refuses to throw out a broken doll and claims to sell it to Gigi to prove its value.; Rebel believes the statistics on accidents in the kitchen refer to the meals-gone-bad that he has to eat.; Li'l Jinx has trouble spelling Mississippi.; Jughead opines about why airports are far out of towns.